I think it started when my 3rd son, Tannin, was born. He came into this world on a cold day in December, 5 weeks early. He weighed 5lbs 5oz and barely made a sound. Within hours of being born it was obvious that he was struggling to breathe so he was Life Flighted to the NICU in Peoria. His lungs weren't quite ready to breathe on their own so with the help of surfactant and a CPAP he lived in an incubator for the first 2 weeks of his life.
If you've never been in a NICU then you've never experienced sterility. It was cold and flu season so they were extra vigilant about making sure that we scrubbed before entering and wearing masks at the sign of anything unusual. Our Dr's, while very kind, made me germ paranoid.
When he was finally able to come home I had scrubbed our house from top to bottom. I was unrealistically trying to maintain the sterile environment he had lived in. Our friends dubbed me the snot police. If you had any hint of a cold you weren't allowed in and we didn't take him out. We lived in a bubble.
It was during this season of life that cleaning became an obsession. My oldest son drew a picture of me cleaning for his 1st grade Mother's Day program, while other kids drew pictures of their mom's playing baseball or baking cookies with them. That broke my heart but I didn't know how to change this aspect of my life.
When you live in a house with 4 kids and 3 dogs it is almost impossible to keep a house clean to the satisfaction of someone with an obsession. We clean daily; vacuum, dust, dishes, windows. I fine tooth the kids room before we can go do anything, which sadly means we don't do stuff many days.
Since I've been back from Mississippi I've decided to make some changes in my life and this is one of them. While we won't live in filth you don't need to be able to eat off my floors. So if you stop in to see me and it looks like somebody licked my patio door please don't comment on it, just smile and know that I'm choosing to spend more time with my family and patio door can wait.
As a saying that hangs in my dear friends kitchen says...
